Not too long ago, we asked you guys to “describe the most annoying individual you’ve ever run into at a show.” We got a lot of responses, many of which were hilarious. Several answers ranged from “any hardcore dancer ever” and “the 350lb neanderthal shoulder checker” to lengthy descriptions of a certain asshole in the crowd. After reading through all of them, it only seemed right to share some with the world. So, here you go. These are the most annoying people at a show, as submitted by you guys.
“Sadly I was in the stands for this, but the view of this was amazing. The band was trying to open up the pit to start the wall of death, this one fucktard kid was just standing in between these two walls of people telling them to bring it on, taunting others and whatnot. I’ll never forget the singer put his leg up on the front amp, pointed to the kid and yelled, “See that guy right there, FUCK HIM UP, I want to see blood. On three: 1, 2, 3, GO!!” As the crowds rushed towards him there was a look on his face that could only be described as, I’ve made a huge mistake, before he was lost in a sea of people. Pretty sure the vocalist telling everyone to fuck him up was illegal or something, but who cares that was the funniest thing I had ever seen and to be honest he kinda deserved it. TL;DR: Kid thought he could take on the wall, he couldn’t.”
“This fucker behind the restroom sink was wearing the same shirt and wouldn’t stop fucking staring at me.”
“The show was about to start. There was a giant circle of empty people towards the front middle, let’s call it the mosh zone. Some girl holding a beer decides the middle of the hole is a good place to stand because no people are there. Show starts, she and her beer get knocked down almost instantly. She finds some guy in the pit and starts punching and clawing him because of the Fallen beer.”
“There was this one kid who was actually in a band himself and he was trying to hype the pit up, so he throws a trashcan towards the front of the stage over a barrier and hits a friend, almost got his ass beat that day.”
“The hate moshers, especially when they say “well then don’t go near the pit if you don’t want any part of it.” Whether I stand in the front or back, someone always hits punches me, and then when I punch back gets all butthurt. Push pits, circles, walls, and even slam pits (if you aren’t a cock bag hate mosh douche.) But that hate mosh bullshit is killing the scene. Who the fuck wants to go to a gig when you are getting punched, slammed into, and stage dived on, by 350lb hot topic kids who’s favorite “hardcore punk band” is rotting out, and who’s daddy didn’t love them.”
“The “can I get in front of you” girl behind me because I’m taller than her and the guy that is on the barricade and feels the need to put a 3ft cocoon around his pregnant girlfriend….yup, pregnant.”
On a similar note… “Guy who takes his girlfriend, stands in the middle front (right behind the mosh pit and tries to create an “impenetrable barrier” for his girlfriend so she doesn’t get “hurt”. Then gets totally pissed if she so happens to get slammed into, cause his ” impenetrable barrier” couldn’t handle it. I’m not opposed to taking your girlfriend to shows, but if you are that guy, stay your ass in the back or by the bar.”
“Last show I went to one of those lets-make-out-at-shows couples moves to stand in front of me right after the music starts. So I breathed really heavy to the back of the girl’s head to the point that her hair was blowing. Then id take a step behind my friend as she turned to find no one behind her. Didn’t take long for them to move.”
“There was this giant dude at a show once that would literally grab people and throw them back so he could get closer to the stage. If you tried having any sort of fun around him he’d get pissed for pushing him or whatever and just throw you to the ground. Ultimate douchebag.”
“People in lawn chairs. LAWNCHAIRS! Fucking really?”
“People who go to a show and get mad when they get shoved by people. It’s a bunch of people crammed into a small area. What the fuck did you think was gonna happen. Also fat fucks that crowd surf. You’re too fat and I’m not going to fuck myself up for the rest of the show for your fat ass”
“The guy who rushes the barrier/stage in the middle of the set to take pictures/videos from the front row. Seriously, I waited out that spot the whole show, don’t just force yourself in.”
“…The overly drunk douchebags that act like they never seen a girl at a death metal show before. Frig off or I’ll cut you.”
“I had a guy ask me to teach him the lyrics to the songs at a Shai Hulud show. He asked me after every song.”
“The asshole who tries to pry my hand off the rail…and ends up getting his fingers broken for fucking with me…especially at a lamb of god show no one gets my spot on the rail! NO ONE!”
“There was this dude about 6 feet tall and he was big and fat like I’d say 300 hundred pounds and he was in the pit drunk off his ass and he was leaning on everyone on the outer pit wall so everyone’s trying to push him off them. They guy smelt like whiskey and pizza.”
“The dicks filming with phones. Multiply by 10 for the dicks filming on iPads.”
“Met this guy at multiple metal shows here in Chicago. He would always show up and find a way to talk to the artists…. And then clearly annoy them by talking to them about veganism or when they clearly were busy or relaxing, like when I saw the faceless at the metro and Alex rudinger was getting good across the street and this cat would not let the man eat! By far the most annoying dude I’ve seen at multiple concerts throughout the Chicago area.”
“I almost fought a huge, sweaty, drunk girl at a Meshuggah show. She was leaning on people to stay vertical and wouldn’t shut up. Also, dudes with long braids shouldn’t headbang. Please.”
“Megadeth in Milwaukee, the rave. Big drunk dude just yelling fuck Metallica to Dave mustaine in between each song. Some of us could agree maybe the first 3 times he said it, but beyond that was just annoying af.”
“SOME BITCH PUT GUM IN MY HAIR BECAUSE I WAS HAVING A GOOD TIME AND SHE WASNT.”
“Any stupid hardcore dancer. Back in the day there was all unity and positive stuff. Now it’s all about me, hey look how hard I am, hey look how cool I am. Bah I fuckin’ hate that stupid attitude.”
“Guy that two steps non stop when the band is setting up, announcing something, and tearing down gear. Just two stepping when music isn’t being played.”
“Dick chins punching you in the kidneys or trying to pull your shoes off while crowd surfing.”
“A guy that stood in the middle of the floor… Didnt move, just had his arm crossed and glared daggers at anyone that so much as brushed him…kinda ruined the experience having to gooseguard him all night lest i accidently bump him and get knocked out…were all havin a good time bro lighten up or stand to the side away from people.”
“The poser girls that are at a festival for one band and won’t shut the fuck up about “how hot the lead singer is”.
“The people that keep screaming so they will get noticed. No one is there to see/hear you. Shut up. Or the person that keeps yelling another bands name. “Slayer! Bring on Slayer!” Fuck you, I want to hear Mastodon.”
“The big dumb fuck that always has black biker boots on, is plastered, and stomps around the whole place trying to start mosh pits in random areas. Oh and is usually shirtless. I’m not a big dude by any means but if I’m on the edge of a pit and he is coming toward me, Elbow that motherfucker in the spine.”
“People on LSD leaning against you. I had two guys drop acid next to me at a devildriver show. I was front row, they were behind me. Leaned against me for about 10 minutes, kept trying to redirect them off me but they kept leaning against me. Finally me and some other guys shuffled them to the 4th or 5th row, like right in front of the pit, they were so fucked up they had no idea what was going on…Might have actually been on heroine”
Yet again… On a similar note… “This one drunk guy leaning against me, bumping into me, grabbing at me when he fell and screaming jibberish at the band right beside my ear. I shoved him back and told him to fuck off at least 20 times. His buddy apologized for him and told me it was his first time drunk but it still ruined a lot of the show for me.”
“Excessive whistlers. Like seriously shut the fuck up that shit is so annoying.”
“The guy that tries to trip people during a circle pit.”
“Myself or the preaching band on stage.”
“Any all ages show ever…”
“The “tough” guy.”
“I’m the guy that yells freebird.”
And, if you’re looking for remedies for such behavior, check out our other specials…
How Not To Suck At Being A Metal Fan
Mosh Pit Etiquette
For everyone else, feel free to comment your own experience of an annoying individual at a show. We might just bring around a Part 2!
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